Crazy Newspaper Edition 1
Science
14 february 2005

3. Saudi "women" wear burkas

Did you really believe that Iraq was invaded because they owned weapons of mass destruction? You must be crazy! There are no such weapons in Iraq. To understand this problem, you obviously need more background.

Always felt sorry for those "women" in burka? Well, simply don't. Most of them are aliens, trying to hide their atrocious bodies. They're controlling our world from the Middle East. But the brave Iraqi people revolted against them, and the aliens needed support from American soldiers, because defending themselves would affect too much suspicion.

That's my third proof. And remember, the brave Iraqi people are revolting against the alien domination, and the American soldiers are helping them by oppressing the revolution. What a shame!

Ultramodern Dutch mowing machine

If you say the Netherlands, you imagine plains, lakes and windmills like on the right. But there is more than that. A large group of civil engineers developed a new sort of mowing-machine after several years of high technology research. The concept of this mowing-machine might seem quite ordinary, but its characteristics aren't.

Windmill

Did you always have troubles to mow your grass? With this extraordinary mowing-machine, all your troubles will be gone in the minute.

This ultramodern invention needs no electricity cables, in fact it doesn't need any electricity at all! And no, it will never run out of gas, because it can run without it!

Aren't you convinced yet? Then this magnificent feature will convince you. This invention runs automatically, I mean, you don't have to do anything, you don't even have to configure it. It does all the work alone. You can just lay on your bed and relax!

This means that this mowing-machine is ideal for all those who hate to mow their grass, for those who always mow through their electricity cables and for those who have annoying neighbors. Annoying neighbors? I'll explain it. This invention makes almost no noise at all, that means no neighbors complaining. Simple, isn't it?

And what does this mowing machine need in order to work correctly, are you asking yourself now? Well, in fact, except for the grass and the water, it needs nothing at all. It only produces a white liquid, a real gift from heaven. You can drink it warm, cold or even make cheese of it. Isn't that great!

Mowing-machine

This mowing machine, consisting of 4 sheep, is now available for the unique sum of 999$. Be quick and order this month and you will have a chance to win the oldest cheese in the whole world, made by William The Conqueror himself! I wouldn't doubt if I were you!

Suicide Pill

New suicide pill KG-451 now available.
Side effects : headache, vomitting and itch.
Do not take more than once.


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